type the first thing that pops in your mind

there is a lot happening in my head. i just got off the phone and cemented my plans for the future. part of me sighs with relief the other part is freaking out. back to that world. back to that life. back to the life i once knew. march. choose a path laurie...choose a path...i chose it. i ended the war. i will not live with a what if...i will not hide again...i know what i was made to do. i could opt the easy way out. i could sit here in my mess and jump on the life carousel or burn it down and walk away. that phone call was the match. no starting wage. no 401k . no security. so why do i feel so secure. im rambling and mumbling at the same time. im here and there . im back and forth. man...i sound crazy.